I’m the co-president elect for our branch of AAUW, and a few of us had a conference call yesterday to talk about programming for the upcoming year. We decided we need and want to program around issues of race, and I’m so proud of my colleagues.
Our branch is almost entirely white, women who have experienced privilege based on skin color and, of course, that includes me. But we feel the pain, suffering, and inhumanity deeply, like you do.
So we decided to open up this discussion with our members (who are already civic-minded, thank goodness) and hopefully raise awareness and inspire action.
I’m guessing that you, like me, have always thought of yourself as anti-racist, painfully aware of the plight of those without the privilege of white skin. But the future of our democracy is at stake, right now, and I’m committing to doing things differently. In my personal life and in my work. I have no idea what that will look like yet, but the problems we’re facing, a full blown, undeniable catastrophe, demand that each of us step up in a way we haven’t before.
What’s changed for me is the realization that even though I’ve always felt that equal rights, and opportunity and safety for all, are crucial, I’m finally getting on a visceral level that the very future of this once great country (please don’t argue with me about America’s greatness – we’re in decline, it’s obvious), depends on all of us coming together, eyes and hearts wide open, and figuring this out.
The truth is, so many white people see these issues of race as someone else’s problem. The whole, “I don’t see color” escape, therefore, “I don’t need to do anything differently.” I’ve been guilty of this, and it’s bullshit.
And it’s not true. If society continues to break down, if people of color continue to be targeted and murdered (in public, on video!), we’re all doomed. I get it now. I realize it shouldn’t have taken me this long, but there’s nothing I can do about my delayed understanding. All I can do now is move forward.
So I commit to helping and supporting people who don’t have the white-skin advantage, probably with a focus on women and girls of color, since I’m a feminist at heart. Donating time and money, and certainly taking action, are my plan, because I now see that I do in fact have the means to make change, and can make at least a small difference in the world, versus feeling helpless and sitting it out in sheer despair. It’s time to step up and help stop this insanity. It’s time.
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10 Comments
“If society continues to break down, if people of color continue to be targeted and murdered (in public, on video!), we’re all doomed. I get it now.” – SO PERFECT!! As a Jewish woman, I’ve been taught about Nazis, anti-semitism… plus I’ve known since the last big election Trump is definitely a true Nazi – BUT, the “we are all doomed” never wrung more true than NOW. And YOU summed it up precisely. It’s time we all get active or we are unquestionably doomed. Love you, Deonne!! Xo
Lauren – I agree about Trump, he’s been waving his racist flag since day one. We’ve never talked about it, if you’ve experienced anti-semitism in your life, but I’d love to know. Let’s join together and not be doomed, how about that? I know that’s a flip thing to say, but I feel on the precipice with everyone else, and a little levity is all I’m hanging onto today. Ugh.
Deonne – we had a demonstration in Taos at the intersection of Kit Carson and the plaza. Over 400 people. And we laid face down-hands behind our backs for 8 minutes and 46 seconds. In my entire life I have never felt the street this way and tears fell to the hard cement of our times.
Some mornings are like this.
Sitting
in silence.
Golden morning light
of a new day.
The sadness of
our time
surrounds me,
wraps around,
and tears
try to wash it away.
Slowly these tears
go away
leaving the sadness
unattended.
And without warning
a lone tear
slowly makes its
solitary way down
my left cheek,
to remind me
that the sadness
of the day
is still here.
Take care, my friend
Ron – I saw photos of the protest and I was so proud of Taos. I can only imagine what it felt like to lie there and think of poor George Floyd. There haven’t been any protests here as far as I know, but I’m keeping my eyes open. Your poem is beautiful – sad and true. Thanks for sharing it.
I can’t say I share this communal white guilt trip. Mainly because my relatives are first generation Italians and bear no guilt for the past sins of slavery. Italians who immigrated here got no special treatment for being ‘white skinned’ and had to work just as hard as any immigrant race of any color. So I do not share your guilt and have all my life treated people with whatever respect they afforded me in return. I have seen video after video of black Americans, men & women disgusted by white people treating them like they are victims and asking us to stop apologizing for slavery in the year 2020. I do not support BLM. I support ALM. And I will never apologize for the skin color God gave me.
Catherine, I don’t feel guilty, I feel despair over how people are mistreated because of skin color – and even murdered – in what is supposedly modern society. It’s not an issue of who’s responsible for slavery – obviously, that’s not you or me or our families – it’s about stepping up to do whatever we can to start changing a profoundly broken system. What we’ve been doing clearly isn’t working if a woman can be shot to death in her bed, for example. I see a whole lot of people who are completely blind to their racism and biases, and I’m simply saying I want to make sure I’m not one of them. It’s no threat to me to help others with less advantage, I’ve always felt this way and lived it in practice, but these are dire times, and I want to step up my game for the betterment of every citizen, regardless of color.
Sorry I didn’t respond to this much earlier. I did on FB, but not here. I knew what was going on over many years and that people of color are discriminated against. Now with people videoing everything, it is so blatant the hatred in this country, There are so many incidences I can’t name all of them. I get angry every day for what is reported. Another incident in San Francisco today. A white couple didn’t like that a person of color had a sign on his property “black lives matter”. They called the police. The police new the man, stopped, waved and drove on. And they are being filmed being racist and still did it. Just sickening what people are doing. I don’t understand it.
Mom, it is sickening and impossible to understand. Your good heart and kindness make a difference, though.
Dear ISHY,
One comment struck me, On ABC when Beauty Queen Amy Roback was asked by an interview she was giving, What Lives Matter, her response, caught off guard(parenthetical), thinking responded Black Lives Matter because that is what makes All Lives Matter. Many people finding the piece of the puzzle are opposed to it being the most important piece. It’s not the most important piece, but it is the essential piece that completes the puzzle, it wouldn’t be the puzzle if it had a hole in it, it would be a picture with a hole in it. To make it whole and to have All Lives Matter, you must first identify with Black Lives Matter that is What Makes All Lives Matter, and that was the correct response she gave her interview. He replied with a fist up(parenthetical). The same goes for Autism, its symbol in place is a colored piece of a puzzle. Its one of the whole declaring lets include the piece, its one of us, and many Autistic on the spectrum, is just that part of the spectrum, what we refer to as a healthy mind as opposed to a rich brilliant as opposed to an artistic mind that doesn’t seem the sense in grasping at mathematics when his or her knowledge excels at music performance which contains infinite forms of math, or memorization of coastlines and landmarks on those coastlines which photography compares on an equal base to. The Artistic sense of Autism is Art Autistic which lands on the spectrum and computes to many as the UltraViolet is unseen. If its not Black or White to many, it becomes grey in understanding, instead there is beauty in seeing past the colors we understand and loving that in which we don’t understand. I have Love for Black Lives and no room for Hate for anyone, even the current administration for many reasons.
It was interesting to see 1881 being the year of formation of AAUW, the same year Emerson College was formed in Boston. I graduated there. I’m currently reading a Burroughs Book, where a whole chapter is on Apples. I have to ask where have all the Apples gone?, I also follow Maria Popova, I’m not sure if you turned me onto her so many years ago, Goblin’s Gold is my latest fascination. With all your trapeze work, I’m wondering if you will every come across some in a Cave. Schustastiga. Who would ever be interested in Moss. Well, I would, I planted Irish Moss and Scottish Moss this year, The scottish isn’t doing so well, in its first season.
With much Love, you now I adore you,
Rob Toscano
Rob, I’m glad to be back to blogging for many reasons, but one of them – seriously – is because the world needs more of your always interesting comments. Thank you. 🙂 (I may have turned you on to Popova, she’s fabulous.)